While
reading the profile by Jon Franklin, different emotions and thoughts were
whirling through my head the entire time.
Franklin began his work with quick introduction to Dr. Ducker’s workday
followed up with Mrs. Kelly’s story. This introduction immediately grabbed my
interest as the reader. Franklin mapped out exactly what was going in with “the
monster” and how severely it affected her for 57 years.
As Franklin
continued, he used direct quotes from Mrs. Kelly like “I’m not afraid to die”
and “ I’ve lost part of my eye sight…” By using these direct quotes, Franklin
shows the reader just how harmful “the monster” has been.
Through the
entire profile, Franklin uses descriptive words to emphasis how microscopic and
intense the surgery is which makes a vivid image for the reader. His continuous
use of millimeter enforces the fact that surgery of the brain is intense.
Franklin
continues to write in a way that makes the reader want to continue, which is
one of the main goals of a profile. Additionally, his illustration of Mrs.
Kelly and her struggle makes you feel for her. Franklin writes in a way that
you gain hope when he gets the first aneurism, then lose hope when the monster
is in the way. Franklin’s writing has your emotions up and down the entire time.
Franklin makes the reader attached to Mrs. Kelly, it is very disappointing to
see that “the monster won.”
I agree with you on how the introduction immediately makes you want to read more and find out what is going on. Looking at the language that he used, there were a few terms that heightened the intensity level of the situation. As you mentioned the word "millimeter" was definitely one of them. It was sad to see that Mrs Kelly did not make it through the surgery, but knowing that she was at terms with dying after suffering through her "monster" it made it better knowing she was pain-free.
ReplyDeleteThe introduction the the surgery I think is the most important aspect of the entire thing. Not only does the reader get sucked in to the story line, but the reader also sees two perspectives here, one about the way the surgeon prepares for the day and one about how Ms. Kelly prepares. The surgeon takes a natural way to prepare, even though he's never done this surgery before, he still skips out on coffee, as always, because he needs steady hands. Kelly prepares by kissing her husband goodbye, knowing it may be the last time. Through this, the reader sees just how differently the two will be effected if this ends badly.
ReplyDeleteI agree that the language here helped the reader understand how severe the surgery actually is and how much is at stake. However, it also creates a huge impact by simply stating that the monster "won."
I also noticed how effective the direct quotes were throughout this piece. I can see how important that will be for all of us when we write our own profiles. Not only does it make the author look credible, since he or she is quoting directly from the source, therefore they must have been interviewed, but it also gives the piece some personality in the form of the person being interviewed.
ReplyDeleteI agree. I feel like he did well at putting emphasis on the surgery and what it took to even attempt to save her. The style made it easy to keep reading. I really appreciated the way he kept note of the time and Mrs. Kelly's heart rate, it was really effective. I also feel like adding her direct quotes in just the right spots helped maintain reader's interest as well.
ReplyDeleteI agree that the author's use of 'millimeter' could make the reader picture how tense this operating room would have been. The descriptions the author uses definitely do take the reader for a wild ride through different emotions. The direct quotes made it easy to relate to Mrs. Kelly, and have sympathy for her at the same time. The ending of the story was extremely disappointing for me as I find myself left with unanswered questions and little hope.
ReplyDeleteI agree that the use of the details and descriptions in this story made you want to read more. At the end of the story I was kind of upset that it was over. It was very engaging. Also, I like how you say that you feel sympathy for Mrs. Kelly. His description of her was a description of a woman that we may all know. There was nothing different between her and another woman her age besides the fact that she was sick. It makes you realize that something as terrible as this can happen to anybody.
ReplyDeleteI definitely agree with you that introduction of the story kept me reading, I couldn't help but wonder what was going to happen to Mrs. Kelley. The author was able to do an awesome job of painting a vivid description and keeping the scene kind of tense, and suspicious as to what was going to happen next.
ReplyDelete